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confessio amantis-第135章

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Was nevere mad to my behove。
Bot al the whiles that I hove
In noncertein betwen the tuo;
And not if I to wel or wo    2180
Schal torne; that is al my drede;
So that I not what is to rede。
Bot for final conclusion
I thenke a Supplicacion
With pleine wordes and expresse
Wryte unto Venus the goddesse;
The which I preie you to bere
And bringe ayein a good ansuere。
Tho was betwen mi Prest and me
Debat and gret perplexete:   2190
Mi resoun understod him wel;
And knew it was sothe everydel
That he hath seid; bot noght forthi
Mi will hath nothing set therby。
For techinge of so wis a port
Is unto love of no desport;
Yit myhte nevere man beholde
Reson; wher love was withholde;
Thei be noght of o governance。
And thus we fellen in distance;    2200
Mi Prest and I; bot I spak faire;
And thurgh mi wordes debonaire
Thanne ate laste we acorden;
So that he seith he wol recorden
To speke and stonde upon mi syde
To Venus bothe and to Cupide;
And bad me wryte what I wolde;
And seith me trewly that he scholde
Mi lettre bere unto the queene。
And I sat doun upon the grene    2210
Fulfilt of loves fantasie;
And with the teres of myn ije
In stede of enke I gan to wryte
The wordes whiche I wolde endite
Unto Cupide and to Venus;
And in mi lettre I seide thus。
The wofull peine of loves maladie;
Ayein the which mai no phisique availe;
Min herte hath so bewhaped with sotie;
That wher so that I reste or I travaile;    2220
I finde it evere redy to assaile
Mi resoun; which that can him noght defende:
Thus seche I help; wherof I mihte amende。
Ferst to Nature if that I me compleigne;
Ther finde I hou that every creature
Som time ayer hath love in his demeine;
So that the litel wrenne in his mesure
Hath yit of kinde a love under his cure;
And I bot on desire; of which I misse:
And thus; bot I; hath every kinde his blisse。  2230
The resoun of my wit it overpasseth;
Of that Nature techeth me the weie
To love; and yit no certein sche compasseth
Hou I schal spede; and thus betwen the tweie
I stonde; and not if I schal live or deie。
For thogh reson ayein my will debate;
I mai noght fle; that I ne love algate。
Upon miself is thilke tale come;
Hou whilom Pan; which is the god of kinde;
With love wrastlede and was overcome:    2240
For evere I wrastle and evere I am behinde;
That I no strengthe in al min herte finde;
Wherof that I mai stonden eny throwe;
So fer mi wit with love is overthrowe。
Whom nedeth help; he mot his helpe crave;
Or helpeles he schal his nede spille:
Pleinly thurghsoght my wittes alle I have;
Bot non of hem can helpe after mi wille;
And als so wel I mihte sitte stille;
As preie unto mi lady eny helpe:   2250
Thus wot I noght wherof miself to helpe。
Unto the grete Jove and if I bidde;
To do me grace of thilke swete tunne;
Which under keie in his celier amidde
Lith couched; that fortune is overrunne;
Bot of the bitter cuppe I have begunne;
I not hou ofte; and thus finde I no game;
For evere I axe and evere it is the same。
I se the world stonde evere upon eschange;
Nou wyndes loude; and nou the weder softe;  2260
I mai sen ek the grete mone change;
And thing which nou is lowe is eft alofte;
The dredfull werres into pes fulofte
Thei torne; and evere is Danger in o place;
Which wol noght change his will to do me grace。
Bot upon this the grete clerc Ovide;
Of love whan he makth his remembrance;
He seith ther is the blinde god Cupide;
The which hath love under his governance;
And in his hond with many a fyri lance   2270
He woundeth ofte; ther he wol noght hele;
And that somdiel is cause of mi querele。
Ovide ek seith that love to parforne
Stant in the hond of Venus the goddesse;
Bot whan sche takth hir conseil with Satorne;
Ther is no grace; and in that time; I gesse;
Began mi love; of which myn hevynesse
Is now and evere schal; bot if I spede:
So wot I noght miself what is to rede。
Forthi to you; Cupide and Venus bothe;   2280
With al myn hertes obeissance I preie;
If ye were ate ferste time wrothe;
Whan I began to love; as I you seie;
Nou stynt; and do thilke infortune aweie;
So that Danger; which stant of retenue
With my ladi; his place mai remue。
O thou Cupide; god of loves lawe;
That with thi Dart brennende hast set afyre
Min herte; do that wounde be withdrawe;
Or yif me Salve such as I desire:  2290
For Service in thi Court withouten hyre
To me; which evere yit have kept thin heste;
Mai nevere be to loves lawe honeste。
O thou; gentile Venus; loves queene;
Withoute gult thou dost on me thi wreche;
Thou wost my peine is evere aliche grene
For love; and yit I mai it noght areche:
This wold I for my laste word beseche;
That thou mi love aquite as I deserve;
Or elles do me pleinly forto sterve。  2300
Whanne I this Supplicacioun
With good deliberacioun;
In such a wise as ye nou wite;
Hadde after min entente write
Unto Cupide and to Venus;
This Prest which hihte Genius
It tok on honde to presente;
On my message and forth he wente
To Venus; forto wite hire wille。
And I bod in the place stille;  2310
And was there bot a litel while;
Noght full the montance of a Mile;
Whan I behield and sodeinly
I sih wher Venus stod me by。
So as I myhte; under a tre
To grounde I fell upon mi kne;
And preide hire forto do me grace:
Sche caste hire chiere upon mi face;
And as it were halvinge a game
Sche axeth me what is mi name。  2320
〃Ma dame;〃 I seide; 〃John Gower。〃
〃Now John;〃 quod sche; 〃in my pouer
Thou most as of thi love stonde;
For I thi bille have understonde;
In which to Cupide and to me
Somdiel thou hast compleigned thee;
And somdiel to Nature also。
Bot that schal stonde among you tuo;
For therof have I noght to done;
For Nature is under the Mone    2330
Maistresse of every lives kinde;
Bot if so be that sche mai finde
Som holy man that wol withdrawe
His kindly lust ayein hir lawe;
Bot sielde whanne it falleth so;
For fewe men ther ben of tho;
Bot of these othre ynowe be;
Whiche of here oghne nycete
Ayein Nature and hire office
Deliten hem in sondri vice;  2340
Wherof that sche fulofte hath pleigned;
And ek my Court it hath desdeigned
And evere schal; for it receiveth
Non such that kinde so deceiveth。
For al onliche of gentil love
Mi court stant alle courtz above
And takth noght into retenue
Bot thing which is to kinde due;
For elles it schal be refused。
Wherof I holde thee excused;    2350
For it is manye daies gon;
That thou amonges hem were on
Which of my court hast ben withholde;
So that the more I am beholde
Of thi desese to commune;
And to remue that fortune;
Which manye daies hath the grieved。
Bot if my conseil mai be lieved;
Thou schalt ben esed er thou go
Of thilke unsely jolif wo;   2360
Wherof thou seist thin herte is fyred:
Bot as of that thou hast desired
After the sentence of thi bille;
Thou most therof don at my wille;
And I therof me wole avise。
For be thou hol; it schal suffise:
Mi medicine is noght to sieke
For thee and for suche olde sieke;
Noght al per chance as ye it wolden;
Bot so as ye be reson scholden;    2370
Acordant unto loves kinde。
For in the plit which I thee finde;
So as mi court it hath awarded;
Thou schalt be duely rewarded;
And if thou woldest more crave;
It is no riht that thou it have。〃
Venus; which stant withoute lawe
In noncertein; bot as men drawe
Of Rageman upon the chance;
Sche leith no peis in the balance;    2380
Bot as hir lyketh forto weie;
The trewe man fulofte aweie
Sche put; which hath hir grace bede;
And set an untrewe in his stede。
Lo; thus blindly the world sche diemeth
In loves cause; as tome siemeth:
I not what othre men wol sein;
Bot I algate am so besein;
And stonde as on amonges alle
Which am out of hir grace falle:   2390
It nedeth take no witnesse;
For sche which seid is the goddesse;
To whether part of love it wende;
Hath sett me for a final ende
The point wherto that I schal holde。
For whan sche hath me wel beholde;
Halvynge of scorn; sche seide thus:
〃Thou wost wel that I am Venus;
Which al only my lustes seche;
And wel I wot; thogh thou beseche  2400
Mi love; lustes ben ther none;
Whiche I mai take in thi persone;
For loves lust and lockes hore
In chambre acorden neveremore;
And thogh th
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