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He was the worst son of a thief that ever drawed breath。 Pard； he was on
it！ He was on it bigger than an Injun！〃
〃On it？ On what？〃
〃On the shoot。 On the shoulder。 On the fight； you understand。
He didn't give a continental for any body。 Beg your pardon； friend； for
coming so near saying a cuss…wordbut you see I'm on an awful strain； in
this palaver； on account of having to cramp down and draw everything so
mild。 But we've got to give him up。 There ain't any getting around
that； I don't reckon。 Now if we can get you to help plant him〃
〃Preach the funeral discourse？ Assist at the obsequies？〃
〃Obs'quies is good。 Yes。 That's itthat's our little game。 We are
going to get the thing up regardless； you know。 He was always nifty
himself； and so you bet you his funeral ain't going to be no slouch
solid silver door…plate on his coffin； six plumes on the hearse； and a
nigger on the box in a biled shirt and a plug hathow's that for high？
And we'll take care of you； pard。 We'll fix you all right。 There'll be
a kerridge for you； and whatever you want； you just 'scape out and we'll
'tend to it。 We've got a shebang fixed up for you to stand behind； in
No。 1's house； and don't you be afraid。 Just go in and toot your horn；
if you don't sell a clam。 Put Buck through as bully as you can； pard；
for anybody that knowed him will tell you that he was one of the whitest
men that was ever in the mines。 You can't draw it too strong。 He never
could stand it to see things going wrong。 He's done more to make this
town quiet and peaceable than any man in it。 I've seen him lick four
Greasers in eleven minutes； myself。 If a thing wanted regulating； he
warn't a man to go browsing around after somebody to do it； but he would
prance in and regulate it himself。 He warn't a Catholic。 Scasely。 He
was down on 'em。 His word was； 'No Irish need apply！' But it didn't
make no difference about that when it came down to what a man's rights
wasand so； when some roughs jumped the Catholic bone…yard and started
in to stake out town…lots in it he went for 'em！ And he cleaned 'em；
too！ I was there； pard； and I seen it myself。〃
〃That was very well indeedat least the impulse waswhether the act was
strictly defensible or not。 Had deceased any religious convictions？
That is to say； did he feel a dependence upon； or acknowledge allegiance
to a higher power？'
More reflection。
〃I reckon you've stumped me again； pard。 Could you say it over once
more； and say it slow？〃
〃Well； to simplify it somewhat； was he； or rather had he ever been
connected with any organization sequestered from secular concerns and
devoted to self…sacrifice in the interests of morality？〃
〃All down but nineset 'em up on the other alley； pard。〃
〃What did I understand you to say？〃
〃Why； you're most too many for me； you know。 When you get in with your
left I hunt grass every time。 Every time you draw； you fill； but I don't
seem to have any luck。 Lets have a new deal。〃
〃How？ Begin again？〃
〃That's it。〃
〃Very well。 Was he a good man； and〃
〃ThereI see that； don't put up another chip till I look at my hand。
A good man； says you？ Pard； it ain't no name for it。 He was the best
man that everpard； you would have doted on that man。 He could lam any
galoot of his inches in America。 It was him that put down the riot last
election before it got a start； and everybody said he was the only man
that could have done it。 He waltzed in with a spanner in one hand and a
trumpet in the other； and sent fourteen men home on a shutter in less
than three minutes。 He had that riot all broke up and prevented nice
before anybody ever got a chance to strike a blow。 He was always for
peace； and he would have peacehe could not stand disturbances。 Pard；
he was a great loss to this town。 It would please the boys if you could
chip in something like that and do him justice。 Here once when the Micks
got to throwing stones through the Methodis' Sunday school windows； Buck
Fanshaw； all of his own notion； shut up his saloon and took a couple of
six…shooters and mounted guard over the Sunday school。 Says he； 'No
Irish need apply！' And they didn't。 He was the bulliest man in the
mountains； pard！ He could run faster； jump higher； hit harder； and hold
more tangle…foot whisky without spilling it than any man in seventeen
counties。 Put that in； pardit'll please the boys more than anything
you could say。 And you can say； pard； that he never shook his mother。〃
〃Never shook his mother？〃
〃That's itany of the boys will tell you so。〃
〃Well； but why should he shake her？〃
〃That's what I saybut some people does。〃
〃Not people of any repute？〃
〃Well； some that averages pretty so…so。〃
〃In my opinion the man that would offer personal violence to his own
mother； ought to〃
〃Cheese it； pard； you've banked your ball clean outside the string。
What I was a drivin' at； was； that he never throwed off on his mother
don't you see？ No indeedy。 He give her a house to live in； and town
lots； and plenty of money； and he looked after her and took care of her
all the time； and when she was down with the small…pox I'm d…d if he
didn't set up nights and nuss her himself！ Beg your pardon for saying
it； but it hopped out too quick for yours truly。
You've treated me like a gentleman； pard； and I ain't the man to hurt
your feelings intentional。 I think you're white。 I think you're a
square man； pard。 I like you； and I'll lick any man that don't。 I'll
lick him till he can't tell himself from a last year's corpse！ Put it
there！〃 ＇Another fraternal hand…shakeand exit。＇
The obsequies were all that 〃the boys〃 could desire。 Such a marvel of
funeral pomp had never been seen in Virginia。 The plumed hearse； the
dirge…breathing brass bands； the closed marts of business； the flags
drooping at half mast； the long； plodding procession of uniformed secret
societies； military battalions and fire companies； draped engines；
carriages of officials； and citizens in vehicles and on foot； attracted
multitudes of spectators to the sidewalks； roofs and windows； and for
years afterward； the degree of grandeur attained by any civic display in
Virginia was determined by comparison with Buck Fanshaw's funeral。
Scotty Briggs； as a pall…bearer and a mourner； occupied a prominent place
at the funeral； and when the sermon was finished and the last sentence of
the prayer for the dead man's soul ascended； he responded； in a low
voice； but with feelings：
〃AMEN。 No Irish need apply。〃
As the bulk of the response was without apparent relevancy； it was
probably nothing more than a humble tribute to the memory of the friend
that was gone； for； as Scotty had once said； it was 〃his word。〃
Scotty Briggs； in after days； achieved the distinction of becoming the
only convert to religion that was ever gathered from the Virginia roughs；
and it transpired that the man who had it in him to espouse the quarrel
of the weak out of inborn nobility of spirit was no mean timber whereof
to construct a Christian。 The making him one did not warp his generosity
or diminish his courage； on the contrary it gave intelligent direction to
the one and a broader field to the other。
If his Sunday…school class progressed faster than the other classes； was
it matter for wonder？ I think not。 He talked to his pioneer small…fry
in a language they understood！ It was my large privilege； a month before
he died； to hear him tell the beautiful story of Joseph and his brethren
to his class 〃without looking at the book。〃 I leave it to the reader to
fancy what it was like； as it fell； riddled with slang； from the lips of
that grave； earnest teacher； and was listened to by his little learners
with a consuming interest that showed that they were as unconscious as he
was that any violence was being done to the sacred proprieties！
CHAPTER XLVIII。
The first twenty…six graves in the Virginia cemetery were occupied by
murdered men。 So everybody said； so everybody believed； and so they will
always say and believe。 The reason why there was so much slaughtering
done； was； that in a new mining district the rough element predominates；