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as before the excess of something beautiful that shone out of the blue
of her own。 〃You were looking for me out of the window？〃 I said。
〃You thought I might be walking in the grounds？〃
〃Well； you know； I thought someone was〃she never blanched as she
smiled out that at me。
Oh； how I looked at her now！ 〃And did you see anyone？〃
〃Ah； NO！〃 she returned； almost with the full privilege
of childish inconsequence； resentfully； though with a long
sweetness in her little drawl of the negative。
At that moment； in the state of my nerves； I absolutely believed
she lied； and if I once more closed my eyes it was before the dazzle
of the three or four possible ways in which I might take this up。
One of these； for a moment； tempted me with such singular intensity that；
to withstand it； I must have gripped my little girl with a spasm that；
wonderfully； she submitted to without a cry or a sign of fright。
Why not break out at her on the spot and have it all over？
give it to her straight in her lovely little lighted face？
〃You see； you see； you KNOW that you do and that you already quite
suspect I believe it； therefore； why not frankly confess it to me；
so that we may at least live with it together and learn perhaps；
in the strangeness of our fate； where we are and what it means？〃
This solicitation dropped； alas； as it came： if I could immediately
have succumbed to it I might have spared myselfwell； you'll see what。
Instead of succumbing I sprang again to my feet； looked at her bed；
and took a helpless middle way。 〃Why did you pull the curtain
over the place to make me think you were still there？〃
Flora luminously considered； after which； with her little divine smile：
〃Because I don't like to frighten you！〃
〃But if I had； by your idea； gone out？〃
She absolutely declined to be puzzled； she turned her eyes to the flame
of the candle as if the question were as irrelevant； or at any rate
as impersonal； as Mrs。 Marcet or nine…times…nine。 〃Oh； but you know；〃
she quite adequately answered； 〃that you might come back； you dear；
and that you HAVE！〃 And after a little； when she had got into bed；
I had； for a long time； by almost sitting on her to hold her hand；
to prove that I recognized the pertinence of my return。
You may imagine the general complexion； from that moment； of my nights。
I repeatedly sat up till I didn't know when； I selected moments when my
roommate unmistakably slept； and； stealing out； took noiseless turns
in the passage and even pushed as far as to where I had last met Quint。
But I never met him there again； and I may as well say at once
that I on no other occasion saw him in the house。 I just missed；
on the staircase； on the other hand； a different adventure。
Looking down it from the top I once recognized the presence of a woman
seated on one of the lower steps with her back presented to me；
her body half…bowed and her head； in an attitude of woe； in her hands。
I had been there but an instant； however； when she vanished without
looking round at me。 I knew； nonetheless； exactly what dreadful face
she had to show； and I wondered whether； if instead of being above I had
been below； I should have had； for going up； the same nerve I had lately
shown Quint。 Well； there continued to be plenty of chance for nerve。
On the eleventh night after my latest encounter with that gentleman
they were all numbered nowI had an alarm that perilously skirted it
and that indeed； from the particular quality of its unexpectedness；
proved quite my sharpest shock。 It was precisely the first night during
this series that； weary with watching； I had felt that I might again
without laxity lay myself down at my old hour。 I slept immediately and；
as I afterward knew； till about one o'clock； but when I woke it was
to sit straight up； as completely roused as if a hand had shook me。
I had left a light burning； but it was now out； and I felt an instant
certainty that Flora had extinguished it。 This brought me to my feet
and straight； in the darkness； to her bed； which I found she had left。
A glance at the window enlightened me further； and the striking of a match
completed the picture。
The child had again got upthis time blowing out the taper； and had again；
for some purpose of observation or response； squeezed in behind
the blind and was peering out into the night。 That she now saw
as she had not； I had satisfied myself； the previous timewas proved
to me by the fact that she was disturbed neither by my reillumination
nor by the haste I made to get into slippers and into a wrap。
Hidden； protected； absorbed； she evidently rested on the sill
the casement opened forwardand gave herself up。 There was a great
still moon to help her； and this fact had counted in my quick decision。
She was face to face with the apparition we had met at the lake；
and could now communicate with it as she had not then been able to do。
What I； on my side； had to care for was； without disturbing her；
to reach； from the corridor； some other window in the same quarter。
I got to the door without her hearing me； I got out of it； closed it；
and listened； from the other side； for some sound from her。
While I stood in the passage I had my eyes on her brother's door；
which was but ten steps off and which； indescribably； produced in me
a renewal of the strange impulse that I lately spoke of as my temptation。
What if I should go straight in and march to HIS window？what if；
by risking to his boyish bewilderment a revelation of my motive；
I should throw across the rest of the mystery the long halter
of my boldness？
This thought held me sufficiently to make me cross to his
threshold and pause again。 I preternaturally listened； I figured
to myself what might portentously be； I wondered if his bed were
also empty and he too were secretly at watch。 It was a deep；
soundless minute； at the end of which my impulse failed。
He was quiet； he might be innocent； the risk was hideous；
I turned away。 There was a figure in the groundsa figure
prowling for a sight； the visitor with whom Flora was engaged；
but it was not the visitor most concerned with my boy。
I hesitated afresh； but on other grounds and only for a few seconds；
then I had made my choice。 There were empty rooms at Bly；
and it was only a question of choosing the right one。
The right one suddenly presented itself to me as the lower one
though high above the gardensin the solid corner of the house
that I have spoken of as the old tower。 This was a large；
square chamber； arranged with some state as a bedroom； the extravagant
size of which made it so inconvenient that it had not for years；
though kept by Mrs。 Grose in exemplary order； been occupied。
I had often admired it and I knew my way about in it； I had only；
after just faltering at the first chill gloom of its disuse；
to pass across it and unbolt as quietly as I could one of
the shutters。 Achieving this transit； I uncovered the glass
without a sound and； applying my face to the pane； was able；
the darkness without being much less than within； to see that I
commanded the right direction。 Then I saw something more。
The moon made the night extraordinarily penetrable and
showed me on the lawn a person； diminished by distance；
who stood there motionless and as if fascinated； looking up
to where I had appearedlooking； that is； not so much
straight at me as at something that was apparently above me。
There was clearly another person above methere was a person
on the tower； but the presence on the lawn was not in the least
what I had conceived and had confidently hurried to meet。
The presence on the lawnI felt sick as I made it out
was poor little Miles himself。
XI
It was not till late next day that I spoke to Mrs。 Grose；
the rigor with which I kept my pupils in sight making it often
difficult to meet her privately； and the more as we each felt
the import