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beer？
GERMAN。 Cigarren！
WAITER。 'Komm' gleich'！
ENGLISHMAN。 ＇Consulting watch＇ Train's late。
ENGLISHWOMAN。 Really！ Nuisance！
＇A station POLICEMAN； very square and uniformed； passes and
repasses。＇
AMERICAN。 ＇Resuming his seatto the GERMAN＇ Now； we don't have so
much of that in America。 Guess we feel more to trust in human
nature。
GERMAN。 Ah！ ha！ you will bresently find there is nothing in him
but self。
LITTLE MAN。 ＇Wistfully＇ Don't you believe in human nature？
AMERICAN。 Very stimulating question。
＇He looks round for opinions。 The DUTCH YOUTH laughs。＇
ENGLISHMAN。 ＇Holding out his half of the paper to his wife＇ Swap！
＇His wife swaps。＇
GERMAN。 In human nature I believe so far as I can see himno more。
AMERICAN。 Now that 'pears to me kind o' blasphemy。 I believe in
heroism。 I opine there's not one of us settin' around here that's
not a herogive him the occasion。
LITTLE MAN。 Oh！ Do you believe that？
AMERICAN。 Well！ I judge a hero is just a person that'll help
another at the expense of himself。 Take that poor woman there。
Well； now； she's a heroine； I guess。 She would die for her baby any
old time。
GERMAN。 Animals will die for their babies。 That is nothing。
AMERICAN。 I carry it further。 I postulate we would all die for that
baby if a locomotive was to trundle up right here and try to handle
it。 ＇To the GERMAN＇ I guess you don't know how good you are。 ＇As
the GERMAN is twisting up the ends of his moustacheto the
ENGLISHWOMAN＇ I should like to have you express an opinion； ma'am。
ENGLISHWOMAN。 I beg your pardon。
AMERICAN。 The English are very humanitarian； they have a very high
sense of duty。 So have the Germans； so have the Americans。 ＇To the
DUTCH YOUTH＇ I judge even in your little country they have that。
This is an epoch of equality and high…toned ideals。 ＇To the LITTLE
MAN＇ What is your nationality； sir？
LITTLE MAN。 I'm afraid I'm nothing particular。 My father was
half…English and half…American； and my mother half…German and
half…Dutch。
AMERICAN。 My！ That's a bit streaky； any old way。 ＇The POLICEMAN
passes again＇ Now； I don't believe we've much use any more for those
gentlemen in buttons。 We've grown kind of mildwe don't think of
self as we used to do。
＇The WAITER has appeared in the doorway。＇
GERMAN。 ＇In a voice of thunder＇ 'Cigarren！ Donnerwetter'！
AMERICAN。 ＇Shaking his fist at the vanishing WAITER＇ That flash of
beer！
WAITER。 'Komm' gleich'！
AMERICAN。 A little more； and he will join George Washington！ I was
about to remark when he intruded： In this year of grace 1913 the
kingdom of Christ is quite a going concern。 We are mighty near
universal brotherhood。 The colonel here ＇He indicates the GERMAN＇ is
a man of blood and iron； but give him an opportunity to be
magnanimous； and he'll be right there。 Oh； sir！ yep！
＇The GERMAN； with a profound mixture of pleasure and cynicism；
brushes up the ends of his moustache。＇
LITTLE MAN。 I wonder。 One wants to； but somehow ＇He shakes his
head。＇
AMERICAN。 You seem kind of skeery about that。 You've had experience；
maybe。 I'm an optimistI think we're bound to make the devil hum in
the near future。 I opine we shall occasion a good deal of trouble to
that old party。 There's about to be a holocaust of selfish
interests。 The colonel there with old…man Nietch he won't know
himself。 There's going to be a very sacred opportunity。
＇As he speaks； the voice of a RAILWAY OFFICIAL is heard an the
distance calling out in German。 It approaches； and the words
become audible。＇
GERMAN。 ＇Startled＇ 'Der Teufel'！ ＇He gets up； and seizes the bag
beside him。＇
＇The STATION OFFICIAL has appeared； he stands for a moment
casting his commands at the seated group。 The DUTCH YOUTH also
rises； and takes his coat and hat。 The OFFICIAL turns on his
heel and retires still issuing directions。＇
ENGLISHMAN。 What does he say？
GERMAN。 Our drain has come in； de oder platform； only one minute we
haf。
＇All； have risen in a fluster。＇
AMERICAN。 Now； that's very provoking。 I won't get that flash of
beer。
＇There is a general scurry to gather coats and hats and wraps；
during which the lowly WOMAN is seen making desperate attempts
to deal with her baby and the two large bundles。 Quite
defeated； she suddenly puts all down； wrings her hands； and
cries out： 〃Herr Jesu！ Hilfe！〃 The flying procession turn
their heads at that strange cry。＇
AMERICAN。 What's that？ Help？
＇He continues to run。 The LITTLE MAN spins round； rushes back；
picks up baby and bundle on which it was seated。＇
LITTLE MAN。 Come along； good woman； come along！
＇The WOMAN picks up the other bundle and they run。＇
＇The WAITER； appearing in the doorway with the bottle of beer；
watches with his tired smile。＇
CURTAIN
SCENE II
A second…class compartment of a corridor carriage； in motion。
In it are seated the ENGLISHMAN and his WIFE； opposite each
other at the corridor end； she with her face to the engine； he
with his back。 Both are somewhat protected from the rest of the
travellers by newspapers。 Next to her sits the GERMAN； and
opposite him sits the AMERICAN； next the AMERICAN in one window
corner is seated the DUTCH YOUTH； the other window corner is
taken by the GERMAN'S bag。 The silence is only broken by the
slight rushing noise of the train's progression and the
crackling of the English newspapers。
AMERICAN。 ＇Turning to the DUTCH YOUTH＇ Guess I'd like that window
raised； it's kind of chilly after that old run they gave us。
＇The DUTCH YOUTH laughs； and goes through the motions of raising
the window。 The ENGLISH regard the operation with uneasy
irritation。 The GERMAN opens his bag； which reposes on the
corner seat next him； and takes out a book。＇
AMERICAN。 The Germans are great readers。 Very stimulating practice。
I read most anything myself！
＇The GERMAN holds up the book so that the title may be read。＇
〃Don Quixote〃fine book。 We Americans take considerable stock in
old man Quixote。 Bit of a wild…catbut we don't laugh at him。
GERMAN。 He is dead。 Dead as a sheep。 A good thing； too。
AMERICAN。 In America we have still quite an amount of chivalry。
GERMAN。 Chivalry is nothing 'sentimentalisch'。 In modern daysno
good。 A man must push； he must pull。
AMERICAN。 So you say。 But I judge your form of chivalry is
sacrifice to the state。 We allow more freedom to the individual
soul。 Where there's something little and weak； we feel it kind of
noble to give up to it。 That way we feel elevated。
＇As he speaks there is seen in the corridor doorway the LITTLE
MAN； with the WOMAN'S BABY still on his arm and the bundle held
in the other hand。 He peers in anxiously。 The ENGLISH； acutely
conscious； try to dissociate themselves from his presence with
their papers。 The DUTCH YOUTH laughs。＇
GERMAN。 'Ach'！ So！
AMERICAN。 Dear me！
LITTLE MAN。 Is there room？ I can't find a seat。
AMERICAN。 Why； yes！ There's a seat for one。
LITTLE MAN。 ＇Depositing bundle outside； and heaving BABY＇ May I？
AMERICAN。 Come right in！
＇The GERMAN sulkily moves his bag。 The LITTLE MAN comes in and
seats himself gingerly。＇
AMERICAN。 Where's the mother？
LITTLE MAN。 ＇Ruefully＇ Afraid she got left behind。
＇The DUTCH YOUTH laughs。 The ENGLISH unconsciously emerge from
their newspapers。＇
AMERICAN。 My！ That would appear to be quite a domestic incident。