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passage； but not before。〃'
The other animals looked hard at Toad to see how he would take it。
Toad was inclined to be sulky at first； but he brightened up immediately；
like the good fellow he was。
‘Well； well；' he said； ‘perhaps I am a bit of a talker。 A popular fellow
such as I ammy friends get round mewe chaff； we sparkle； we tell witty
storiesand somehow my tongue gets wagging。 I have the gift of
conversation。 I've been told I ought to have a salon； whatever that may be。
Never mind。 Go on； Badger。 How's this passage of yours going to help us？'
‘I've found out a thing or two lately；' continued the Badger。 ‘I got Otter
to disguise himself as a sweep and call at the back… door with brushes over
his shoulder； asking for a job。 There's going to be a big banquet to…morrow
night。 It's somebody's birthdaythe Chief Weasel's； I believeand all the
weasels will be gathered together in the dining…hall； eating and drinking
and laughing and carrying on； suspecting nothing。 No guns； no swords； no
sticks； no arms of any sort whatever！'
‘But the sentinels will be posted as usual；' remarked the Rat。
‘Exactly；' said the Badger； ‘that is my point。 The weasels will trust
entirely to their excellent sentinels。 And that is where the passage comes in。
That very useful tunnel leads right up under the butler's pantry； next to the
dining…hall！'
‘Aha！ that squeaky board in the butler's pantry！' said Toad。 ‘Now I
understand it！'
‘We shall creep out quietly into the butler's pantry' cried the Mole。
‘with our pistols and swords and sticks' shouted the Rat。
‘and rush in upon them；' said the Badger。
‘and whack 'em； and whack 'em； and whack 'em！' cried the Toad in
ecstasy； running round and round the room； and jumping over the chairs
‘Very well； then；' said the Badger； resuming his usual dry manner； ‘our
plan is settled； and there's nothing more for you to argue and squabble
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about。 So； as it's getting very late； all of you go right off to bed at once。 We
will make all the necessary arrangements in the course of the morning to…
morrow。'
Toad； of course； went off to bed dutifully with the resthe knew better
than to refusethough he was feeling much too excited to sleep。 But he
had had a long day； with many events crowded into it； and sheets and
blankets were very friendly and comforting things； after plain straw； and
not too much of it； spread on the stone floor of a draughty cell； and his
head had not been many seconds on his pillow before he was snoring
happily。 Naturally； he dreamt a good deal； about roads that ran away from
him just when he wanted them； and canals that chased him and caught him；
and a barge that sailed into the banqueting…hall with his week's washing；
just as he was giving a dinner…party； and he was alone in the secret
passage； pushing onwards； but it twisted and turned round and shook itself；
and sat up on its end； yet somehow； at the last； he found himself back in
Toad Hall； safe and triumphant； with all his friends gathered round about
him； earnestly assuring him that he really was a clever Toad。
He slept till a late hour next morning； and by the time he got down he
found that the other animals had finished their breakfast some time before。
The Mole had slipped off somewhere by himself； without telling any one
where he was going to。 The Badger sat in the arm…chair； reading the paper；
and not concerning himself in the slightest about what was going to
happen that very evening。 The Rat； on the other hand； was running round
the room busily； with his arms full of weapons of every kind； distributing
them in four little heaps on the floor； and saying excitedly under his breath；
as he ran； ‘Here's…a…sword…for…the…Rat； here's…a…sword… for…the Mole；
here's…a…sword…for…the…Toad； here's…a…sword… for…the…Badger！ Here's…a…
pistol…for…the…Rat； here's…a…pistol… for…the…Mole； here's…a…pistol…for…the…
Toad； here's…a…pistol…for… the…Badger！' And so on； in a regular； rhythmical
way； while the four little heaps gradually grew and grew。
‘That's all very well； Rat；' said the Badger presently； looking at the
busy little animal over the edge of his newspaper； ‘I'm not blaming you。
But just let us once get past the stoats； with those detestable guns of theirs；
and I assure you we shan't want any swords or pistols。 We four； with our
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sticks； once we're inside the dining…hall； why； we shall clear the floor of all
the lot of them in five minutes。 I'd have done the whole thing by myself；
only I didn't want to deprive you fellows of the fun！'
‘It's as well to be on the safe side；' said the Rat reflectively； polishing a
pistol…barrel on his sleeve and looking along it。 The Toad； having finished
his breakfast； picked up a stout stick and swung it vigorously； belabouring
imaginary animals。 ‘I'll learn 'em to steal my house！' he cried。 ‘I'll learn
'em； I'll learn 'em！'
‘Don't say 〃learn 'em；〃 Toad；' said the Rat； greatly shocked。 ‘It's not
good English。'
‘What are you always nagging at Toad for？' inquired the Badger； rather
peevishly。 ‘What's the matter with his English？ It's the same what I use
myself； and if it's good enough for me； it ought to be good enough for
you！'
‘I'm very sorry；' said the Rat humbly。 ‘Only I THINK it ought to be
〃teach 'em；〃 not 〃learn 'em。〃'
‘But we don't WANT to teach 'em；' replied the Badger。 ‘We want to
LEARN 'emlearn 'em； learn 'em！ And what's more； we're going to DO it；
too！'
‘Oh； very well； have it your own way；' said the Rat。 He was getting
rather muddled about it himself； and presently he retired into a corner；
where he could be heard muttering； ‘Learn 'em； teach 'em； teach 'em； learn
'em！' till the Badger told him rather sharply to leave off。
Presently the Mole came tumbling into the room； evidently very
pleased with himself。 ‘I've been having such fun！' he began at once； ‘I've
been getting a rise out of the stoats！'
‘I hope you've been very careful； Mole？' said the Rat anxiously。
‘I should hope so； too；' said the Mole confidently。 ‘I got the idea when
I went into the kitchen； to see about Toad's breakfast being kept hot for
him。 I found that old washerwoman… dress that he came home in yesterday；
hanging on a towel…horse before the fire。 So I put it on； and the bonnet as
well； and the shawl； and off I went to Toad Hall； as bold as you please。
The sentries were on the look…out； of course； with their guns and their
〃Who comes there？〃 and all the rest of their nonsense。 〃Good morning；
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gentlemen！〃 says I； very respectful。 〃Want any washing done to…day？〃
‘They looked at me very proud and stiff and haughty； and said； 〃Go
away； washerwoman！ We don't do any washing on duty。〃 〃Or any other
time？〃 says I。 Ho； ho； ho！ Wasn't I FUNNY； Toad？'
‘Poor； frivolous animal！' said Toad； very loftily。 The fact is； he felt
exceedingly jealous of Mole for what he had just done。