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Thou wilt prove his。 Take him to prison； officer； Correction and
instruction must both work Ere this rude beast will profit。 ELBOW。 He
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must before the deputy； sir； he has given him warning。 The deputy cannot
abide a whoremaster； if he be a whoremonger； and comes before him； he
were as good go a mile on his errand。 DUKE。 That we were all； as some
would seem to be； From our faults； as his faults from seeming； free。
ELBOW。 His neck will come to your waist… a cord； sir。
Enter LUCIO
POMPEY。 I spy comfort； I cry bail。 Here's a gentleman； and a friend
of mine。 LUCIO。 How now； noble Pompey！ What； at the wheels of Caesar？
Art thou led in triumph？ What； is there none of Pygmalion's images； newly
made woman； to be had now for putting the hand in the pocket and
extracting it clutch'd？ What reply； ha？ What say'st thou to this tune； matter；
and method？ Is't not drown'd i' th' last rain； ha？ What say'st thou to't？ Is
the world as it was； man？ Which is the way？ Is it sad； and few words？ or
how？ The trick of it？ DUKE。 Still thus； and thus； still worse！ LUCIO。
How doth my dear morsel； thy mistress？ Procures she still； ha？ POMPEY。
Troth； sir； she hath eaten up all her beef； and she is herself in the tub。
LUCIO。 Why； 'tis good； it is the right of it； it must be so； ever your fresh
whore and your powder'd bawd… an unshunn'd consequence； it must be so。
Art going to prison； Pompey？ POMPEY。 Yes； faith； sir。 LUCIO。 Why； 'tis
not amiss； Pompey。 Farewell； go； say I sent thee thither。 For debt；
Pompey… or how？ ELBOW。 For being a bawd； for being a bawd。 LUCIO。
Well； then； imprison him。 If imprisonment be the due of a bawd； why； 'tis
his right。 Bawd is he doubtless； and of antiquity； too； bawd…born。 Farewell；
good Pompey。 Commend me to the prison； Pompey。 You will turn good
husband now； Pompey； you will keep the house。 POMPEY。 I hope； sir；
your good worship will be my bail。 LUCIO。 No； indeed； will I not；
Pompey； it is not the wear。 I will pray； Pompey； to increase your bondage。
If you take it not patiently； why； your mettle is the more。 Adieu trusty
Pompey。 Bless you； friar。 DUKE。 And you。 LUCIO。 Does Bridget paint
still； Pompey； ha？ ELBOW。 Come your ways； sir； come。 POMPEY。 You
will not bail me then； sir？ LUCIO。 Then； Pompey； nor now。 What news
abroad； friar？ what news？ ELBOW。 Come your ways； sir； come。 LUCIO。
Go to kennel； Pompey； go。
Exeunt ELBOW； POMPEY and OFFICERS
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What news； friar； of the Duke？ DUKE。 I know none。 Can you tell me
of any？ LUCIO。 Some say he is with the Emperor of Russia； other some；
he is in Rome； but where is he； think you？ DUKE。 I know not where； but
wheresoever； I wish him well。 LUCIO。 It was a mad fantastical trick of
him to steal from the state and usurp the beggary he was never born to。
Lord Angelo dukes it well in his absence； he puts transgression to't。 DUKE。
He does well in't。 LUCIO。 A little more lenity to lechery would do no
harm in him； something too crabbed that way； friar。 DUKE。 It is too
general a vice； and severity must cure it。 LUCIO。 Yes； in good sooth； the
vice is of a great kindred； it is well allied； but it is impossible to extirp it
quite； friar； till eating and drinking be put down。 They say this Angelo was
not
made by man and woman after this downright way of creation。 Is it
true； think you？ DUKE。 How should he be made； then？ LUCIO。 Some
report a sea…maid spawn'd him； some； that he was begot between two
stock…fishes。 But it is certain that when he makes water his urine is
congeal'd ice； that I know to be true。 And he is a motion generative； that's
infallible。 DUKE。 You are pleasant； sir； and speak apace。 LUCIO。 Why；
what a ruthless thing is this in him； for the rebellion of a codpiece to take
away the life of a man！ Would the Duke that is absent have done this？ Ere
he would have hang'd a man for the getting a hundred bastards； he would
have paid for the nursing a thousand。 He had some feeling of the sport； he
knew the service； and that instructed him to mercy。 DUKE。 I never heard
the absent Duke much detected for women； he was not inclin'd that way。
LUCIO。 O； sir； you are deceiv'd。 DUKE。 'Tis not possible。 LUCIO。 Who…
not the Duke？ Yes； your beggar of fifty； and his use was to put a ducat in
her clack…dish。 The Duke had crotchets in him。 He would be drunk too；
that let me inform you。 DUKE。 You do him wrong； surely。 LUCIO。 Sir； I
was an inward of his。 A shy fellow was the Duke； and I believe I know the
cause of his withdrawing。 DUKE。 What； I prithee； might be the cause？
LUCIO。 No； pardon； 'tis a secret must be lock'd within the teeth and the
lips； but this I can let you understand： the greater file of the subject held
the Duke to be wise。 DUKE。 Wise？ Why； no question but he was。 LUCIO。
A very superficial； ignorant； unweighing fellow。 DUKE。 Either this is envy
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in you； folly； or mistaking； the very stream of his life； and the business he
hath helmed； must； upon a warranted need； give him a better proclamation。
Let him be but testimonied in his own bringings…forth； and he shall appear
to the envious a scholar； a statesman； and a soldier。 Therefore you speak
unskilfully； or； if your knowledge be more； it is much dark'ned in your
malice。 LUCIO。 Sir； I know him； and I love him。 DUKE。 Love talks with
better knowledge； and knowledge with dearer love。 LUCIO。 Come； sir； I
know what I know。 DUKE。 I can hardly believe that； since you know not
what you speak。 But； if ever the Duke return； as our prayers are he may； let
me desire you to make your answer before him。 If it be honest you have
spoke； you have courage to maintain it； I am bound to call upon you； and I
pray you your name？ LUCIO。 Sir； my name is Lucio； well known to the
Duke。 DUKE。 He shall know you better； sir； if I may live to report you。
LUCIO。 I fear you not。 DUKE。 O； you hope the Duke will return no more；
or you imagine me too unhurtful an opposite。 But； indeed； I can do you
little harm： you'll forswear this again。 LUCIO。 I'll be hang'd first。 Thou art
deceiv'd in me； friar。 But no more of this。 Canst thou tell if Claudio die to…
morrow or no？ DUKE。 Why should he die； sir？ LUCIO。 Why？ For filling
a bottle with a tun…dish。 I would the Duke we talk of were return'd again。
This ungenitur'd agent will unpeople the province with continency；
sparrows must not build in his house…eaves because they are lecherous。
The Duke yet would have dark deeds darkly answered； he would never
bring them to
light。 Would he were return'd！ Marry； this Claudio is condemned for
untrussing。 Farewell； good friar； I prithee pray for me。 The Duke； I say to
thee again； would eat mutton on Fridays。 He's not past it yet； and； I say to
thee； he would mouth with a beggar though she smelt brown bread and
garlic。 Say that I said so。 Farewell。 Exit DUKE。 No might nor greatness in
mortality Can censure scape； back…wounding calumny The whitest virtue
strikes。 What king so strong Can tie the gall up in the slander